If there’s one thing that really makes me cringe, it’s hearing a woman business owner mention somewhere in her introduction that she “doesn’t want to make a lot of money/be a millionaire/rule the world,” that for some reason the only reason she’s in business is to “have fun/help her family make ends meet/get free products.”
Uhm….what?
I usually hear these introductions at women-only networking events, never at Chambers of Commerce or mixed-gender networking events, which makes it even worse because it sounds as if the said women — and it happens more often than I could count — are actually apologizing for having a business, wanting success, wanting money, wanting wealth, wanting to grow her market.
When was the last time you heard a man apologize for owning a business or wanting to make more money? Probably not for a long time, I’m sure.
It didn’t happen at the women-only networking event I attended today, thankfully. In fact, I was fortunate enough to sit at a table with some very driven, very enthusiastic women who clearly had goals for their respective businesses and who made it known that she was ready to get out there and conquer the world. Or at least, make some good connections that will hopefully lead to a sale.
Ironically, the keynote speaker was Sarah Zink, a dynamic and funny business trainer, and she spoke with a lot of passion about networking, what it is, what it isn’t, and how to do it so that you don’t come across as obnoxious or pushy. I think too many women take networking to the other extreme, i.e., we’re so afraid of coming across as aggressive and annoying that we pretend as if we’re just in business for the fun of it rather than to make money/be a millionaire/rule the world. It’s a little too disingenuous by half, if you think about it, because really, if we’re not in business to grow our market and thus make more money, then what on earth are we attending networking events for? I’d rather be sitting at home watching reruns of the The King of Queens, but alas, I do want to make money/be a millionaire/rule the world, and that doesn’t come from sitting around, not taking my business seriously enough to promote it, and not making those connections that will help me as well as others who want to grow their business.
So, c’mon, ladies of enterprise, let’s shed these outdated ideas that having a business and wanting to create wealth for ourselves and our families are somehow antithetical to being a good human being. You work hard for your money and clearly care enough to show up at these events. Let’s see you reap some of the rewards of your ambition and make your dreams come true.
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{ 3 comments }
Hear, hear! Sadly, I have found myself, at times, falling into that trap – mostly when in an all-female arena… Somehow, I think that, instinctively, I know that would not go over well to a male audience, who would be inclined to think, “If you’re not here to make money or promote your business, don’t waste my time.”
It’s time we took pride in our initiatives and proudly show off our hard work and creative ideas. Thanks for a great article.
Dear Paula, thanks so much for the comment! My apologies for not responding sooner. Yes, it’s too bad that we women haven’t been taught how to properly network. We’re always told that women “network differently,” that we should learn how to leverage our strengths to change the tone of old-fashioned networking, blah blah blah, but unfortunately and clearly that hasn’t worked all too well because I still see us often stuck in women’s networking “ghettos” where we just stand around chatting but not really connecting on a business level. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with talking about our business, but somehow we haven’t figured out a way to be comfortable doing just that. Hopefully that will change as more of us enter the entrepreneurship space and take on leadership roles where we can mentor others!
Hiya, Donna! I canNOT believe I waited this long to respond to this comment, and you were so sweet to write it! My apologies!
No, you’re not bitter. Just realistic. The other day I attended a conference for women business owners, and when the guest speaker asked the audience why we decided to start our businesses, the usual answers came up: “Flexibility,” “Freedom,” “Security,” etc. I shouted out, “I wanted to make money!” The speaker laughed and said, “I was wondering if someone was going to say that.”
I started a business for all of the above reasons, but also because I wanted to make money and rule the world. Humble ambitions, you know. I guess I’ve just gotten to the point where I no longer am worried too much about my femininity credentials — I mean, my boobs and ass should be enough proof, right? — so I can just focus on what I want to do.
And yes, I did actually write those words on my blog. Heaven help us.
Cheers,
Marjorie
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